The Booty

I haven’t posted in a while, there just have not been any funny stories. But earlier today I remembered one that happened right before the New Years break.

I was standing in the hallway talking to a second grade teacher as the kids who need extra tutoring arrive early. This little boy who is the funniest kid comes walking up to us. He is a short little pudgy kid, he is some kind of Hispanic and is in ESL. His English isn’t the greatest and he has a bit of a learning disability, but he works hard. He says “Mr. W, I got money for the booty”I asked him what he said “I got money for the booty!” I was so confused so I asked again “Got money for the booty!” I asked with fear in my throat “Gabriel, what is the booty?” He replies like I am an idiot “You know the place where you can buy gifts for your mommy for Christmas?” I try to hold back a laugh “Oh you have money for the boutique?” and he says “Yeah for the booty.”
Out PTA was having a pre-holiday boutique full of knick-knacks and stuff and he had brought money to buy something. And here I was wondering which of hos classmates booty he was buying?

Do You Know Who My Girlfriend Is?

Yesterday towards the end of a class we were cleaning up and a little second grader turned to me and said to me “Do you know who my girlfriend is?” Never sure how to handle these things I just said “No” and went to move on to the next thing.

Now this little boy is super smart, has a ton of personality, and just enough spunk that I like him. I am not a big fan of the angels. Plus the fact that the best looking staff member in our school (IMO) is an aide in his room I was fearful he might say her and I would slip and say something like “Good job”, or “Lucky guy”, or “Damn I’m jealous.”

So a few minutes later we are lined up and he says his girl friend is Gabrielle from High School Musical and he dreams about her. I never saw it but I know it is super popular with the kidd. I looked it up tonight and found a picture of her and when I clicked on images I found a nude photo of her.

All I can say is “Damn kid you have good taste and I am going to have dreams about her as well tonight.” They may be different than his dreams but they will be dreams nevertheless. Oh and yes I checked her age, I am a pervert but not sick for having those thoughts she is almost 20.

Pomp and Circumstance

(A few weeks back)

I was doing a lesson and introduced graduated cylinders to 2nd graders. I asked if they knew what they were called and with a few of them we got it out of them. Then a little girl raised her hand and said “Like graduated from school?” and as I said “Yes” I heard another little six-year old humming “Pomp and Circumstance”